allow me to present you with "cat jumping in and out of a tall box" enjoy!
Thursday, April 30, 2009
mmm... looks delicious
nothing says family sunday dinner like a good roast chicken! just the way grandma used to make it... tender and succulent with all the fixings!what's wrong with my chicken? what do you mean it looks a little funny? i don't get it...
what do you mean grandma never used canned chicken?
word of the day - apr 30 09
frisson
noun
a moment of intense excitement; a shudder; an emotional thrill.
noun
a moment of intense excitement; a shudder; an emotional thrill.
melting! meeelllting...
your brain, it's melting!
stop the global warming in your head with these exciting and stimulating killer sudokus!
stop the global warming in your head with these exciting and stimulating killer sudokus!
if you've forgotten the rules for doing killer sudokus i really don't think your smart enough to be doing killer sudokus in the first place.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
same ho, new pimp
"Judge upholds $100M Bratz verdict"
RIVERSIDE, Calif. - A federal judge had upheld a $100 million jury verdict for Matell Inc. in a lengthy legal battle over rights to the Bratz doll, a rival to Mattel's Barbie.
U.S. District Judge Stephen Larson also confirmed in his ruling late Monday that the Bratz doll is Mattel property. [...] Mattell sued MGA in 2004, alleging that Bratz designer Carter Bryant developed the concept for the pouty-lipped doll while working for Mattel.
i was REALLY hoping that this lawsuit would take the whole bratz line out of business but now i suspect these thinly veiled prostitute dolls for CHILDREN will be marketed until our eyes bleed by the corporate leeches at mattel.
RIVERSIDE, Calif. - A federal judge had upheld a $100 million jury verdict for Matell Inc. in a lengthy legal battle over rights to the Bratz doll, a rival to Mattel's Barbie.
U.S. District Judge Stephen Larson also confirmed in his ruling late Monday that the Bratz doll is Mattel property. [...] Mattell sued MGA in 2004, alleging that Bratz designer Carter Bryant developed the concept for the pouty-lipped doll while working for Mattel.
i was REALLY hoping that this lawsuit would take the whole bratz line out of business but now i suspect these thinly veiled prostitute dolls for CHILDREN will be marketed until our eyes bleed by the corporate leeches at mattel.
word of the day - apr 29 09
somnolent
adjective
1. sleepy; drowsy; inclined to sleep.
2. tending to cause sleepiness or drowsiness.
adjective
1. sleepy; drowsy; inclined to sleep.
2. tending to cause sleepiness or drowsiness.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
job title of the day
"Blown-away Chilualua reunited with owners"
WATERFORD TOWNSHIP, Mich. - Tinker Bell has been reunited with her owners after a 113 km/h gust of wind picked up the tiny Chihuahua and tossed her out of sight.
Dorothy and Lavern Utley credit a pet psychic for guiding them on Monday to a wooded area nearly two kilometres from where eight-month-old Tinker Bell had been last seen. The brown long-haired dog was dirty and hungry but otherwise OK.
The Utleys, of Rochester, had set up an outdoor display Saturday at a flea market in Waterford Township, 40 kilometres northwest of Detroit.
Tinker Bell was standing on their platform trailer when she was swept away.
Dorothy Utley tells The Detroit News that her cherished pet "just went wild" upon seeing her.
WATERFORD TOWNSHIP, Mich. - Tinker Bell has been reunited with her owners after a 113 km/h gust of wind picked up the tiny Chihuahua and tossed her out of sight.
Dorothy and Lavern Utley credit a pet psychic for guiding them on Monday to a wooded area nearly two kilometres from where eight-month-old Tinker Bell had been last seen. The brown long-haired dog was dirty and hungry but otherwise OK.
The Utleys, of Rochester, had set up an outdoor display Saturday at a flea market in Waterford Township, 40 kilometres northwest of Detroit.
Tinker Bell was standing on their platform trailer when she was swept away.
Dorothy Utley tells The Detroit News that her cherished pet "just went wild" upon seeing her.
segue of the day
[...] Turns out these odd-looking ducks [muscovy ducks] with their large, heavy bodies and stubby legs are prized as farmyard – and even backyard – pets. Their chief attributes seem to be that, unlike, say, roosters or geese, muscovies are quiet. They're also hardy, easy to raise, and have a most useful appetite for flies. But perhaps it's their charming habit of wagging their tails, combined with their unusual head movements (Egyptian-like, people say) that has endeared them to so many. They're also reputed to be quite intelligent, to the point of even coming when called.
But where muscovies really shine is dinner.
wait... what?
Being tasty and lean - ...
didn't you JUST say they were charming and endearing?
They're said to have less fat and fewer calories per pound than turkey - muscovy is cooked dozens of ways, appearing in recipes from pate to entree platters. Peppercorn-crusted breast of muscovy duck with blueberries, anyone?
yes, go to great lengths to explain what excellent pets muscovies make and then move right along to cooking directions... if there's a better way to get an orphaned duck adopted, you certainly haven't bothered looking for it.
read more:
"Hershey the plucky mystery duck"
But where muscovies really shine is dinner.
wait... what?
Being tasty and lean - ...
didn't you JUST say they were charming and endearing?
They're said to have less fat and fewer calories per pound than turkey - muscovy is cooked dozens of ways, appearing in recipes from pate to entree platters. Peppercorn-crusted breast of muscovy duck with blueberries, anyone?
yes, go to great lengths to explain what excellent pets muscovies make and then move right along to cooking directions... if there's a better way to get an orphaned duck adopted, you certainly haven't bothered looking for it.
read more:
"Hershey the plucky mystery duck"
canadian fun fact of the day
which canadaian city can proudly say it is home to the world's largest ukrainian easter egg?
click here to find out!
or be a prick and google it yourself... whatever.
click here to find out!or be a prick and google it yourself... whatever.
incongruity of the day
awarded for excellent and ironic picture selection...
from "Exploring Canada by Alphabet"
Y is for Yellowknife, NWT --> This capital city was first settled in 1935 after gold was found in the area.
just look at that throbbing metropolis!
from "Exploring Canada by Alphabet"
Y is for Yellowknife, NWT --> This capital city was first settled in 1935 after gold was found in the area.
just look at that throbbing metropolis!
word of the day - apr 28 09
eleemosynary
adjective
1. of or for charity; charitable; as. "an eleemosynary institution."
2. given in charity; haing the nature of alms; as, "eleemosynary assistance."
3. supported by or dependent on charity; as, "the eleemosynary poor."
did i happen to mention i was doing some eleemosynary works myself by participating in the underwear affair, raising money to fight cancers below the waist?? you too can provide eleemosynary assistance by donating to me by either visiting my personal page, or using the link i created in the sidebar. your assistance is much appreciated! also, your soul will thank you later when you get into heaven... assuming it exists... best to cover your ass just in case.
adjective
1. of or for charity; charitable; as. "an eleemosynary institution."
2. given in charity; haing the nature of alms; as, "eleemosynary assistance."
3. supported by or dependent on charity; as, "the eleemosynary poor."
did i happen to mention i was doing some eleemosynary works myself by participating in the underwear affair, raising money to fight cancers below the waist?? you too can provide eleemosynary assistance by donating to me by either visiting my personal page, or using the link i created in the sidebar. your assistance is much appreciated! also, your soul will thank you later when you get into heaven... assuming it exists... best to cover your ass just in case.
pet peeve of the day
people who refuse to turn their car lights on because it's technically 'day time'
even though it's pissing rain and the sky is black like ebony or the fog is so thick you could slice it with a knife and serve it at a child's birthday party.
even though it's pissing rain and the sky is black like ebony or the fog is so thick you could slice it with a knife and serve it at a child's birthday party.
Monday, April 27, 2009
an ode to stall number 2
oh stall number 2, you get it done
with a door that closes unlike stall number 1
oh stall number 2, you don't sound like the sea
like the gurgly floor drain in stall number 3
oh stall number 2, when one's behind your door
you don't feel the guilt like in wheelchair stall number 4
oh stall number 2, you're the one i will choose
when i'm at work and my bladder's singing the blues
with a door that closes unlike stall number 1
oh stall number 2, you don't sound like the sea
like the gurgly floor drain in stall number 3
oh stall number 2, when one's behind your door
you don't feel the guilt like in wheelchair stall number 4
oh stall number 2, you're the one i will choose
when i'm at work and my bladder's singing the blues
an experiment in morality
i found this article very interesting... social experiments are endlessly entertaining. kinda makes you think... what would you do in the same situation?
"We left 20 wallets around the GTA. Most came back"
Take 20 wallets. Fill each with $43.77 (enough change for a TTC ride and a little extra for good measure), photo ID, baby pictures, a grocery list, receipts, a contact number, an ATM card, a fancy hankie and a handwritten love note.
Now "lose" the wallets in high-traffic areas across Greater Toronto where people work, play and pray. Now wait.
[...]
Of the 20 wallets dropped, 15 have been returned so far. We're trying to reach two additional callers who left messages before this story went to press.
[...]
But before you start feeling too warm and fuzzy, sociologist Robert Brym warns about drawing sweeping conclusions, although he did say 17 out of 20 is "impressive."
"Twenty cases is an awfully small sample," Brym says.
"The results are almost certainly going to be idiosyncratic. On the whole, though, my guess is that in harder economic times, people would be more inclined to take the money."
Fact is, these results are not recessionary results – numerous studies link times of economic crises with a rise in crime.
[...]
Similar wallet experiments conducted by Reader's Digest and the Chicago Sun-Times did note that people in affluent areas were less likely to return found property than those in lower-to-middle class areas.
Our pattern of discovery showed that downtowners were quicker than suburbanites, and that more wallets were returned by men than women. Discuss.
for the whole story, click the article title.
i'm lovin' it...
so i actually followed through with my plan for this weekend and it turned out pretty darned good!
looks tastier than a big mac after a week of dieting! and it's probably just as healthy for you as well...
looks tastier than a big mac after a week of dieting! and it's probably just as healthy for you as well...
word of the day - apr 27 09
imbroglio
noun
1. a complicated and embarrassing state of things.
2. a confused or complicated disagreement or misunderstanding.
3. an intricate, complicated plot, as of a drama or work of fiction.
4. a confused mess; a tangle.
noun
1. a complicated and embarrassing state of things.
2. a confused or complicated disagreement or misunderstanding.
3. an intricate, complicated plot, as of a drama or work of fiction.
4. a confused mess; a tangle.
the great escape
once again, my eyes are making a break for it and this time i think they might actually get away! and they're dragging my brain along with them... you've heard of brains out through the nose but have you ever heard of brains out through eye sockets? sorry to use up your entire gross out quota for the week first thing on monday morning but i needed to share my discomfort! it's making it very hard to concentrate on work... i just want to close my eyes and drape something cold across them! sadly, i don't think there's a billing code for that...
Sunday, April 26, 2009
in lieu of looking good on your wedding day...
so if you're sure you're not going to look your best on your wedding day, you can purposely make yourself look worse... like in pictures, i try to make the weirdest face possible because i've figured out after 26 years, i am not photogenic. so this couple in england dressed as ogres for their wedding...
can you imagine how bad they thought they'd look if they went with ogres as a way to compensate??
can you imagine how bad they thought they'd look if they went with ogres as a way to compensate??
Friday, April 24, 2009
ohh... you look so...
and your hair is so...
and that top fits like a...
and your facial expression makes me...
and your hangbag could...
well, if you can't say something nice, it's best not to say anything at all.
it's kate bosworth at some sort of chole event.
and that top fits like a...
and your facial expression makes me...
and your hangbag could...
well, if you can't say something nice, it's best not to say anything at all.
it's kate bosworth at some sort of chole event.
moral dilemna
is it wrong that i am secrectly thrilled that the office plotter is malfunctioning right before this super pompus and annoying guy's job has to go out? this happened last time too! nothing, let alone someone else's misforture, should make a person SO happy...
word of the day - apr 24 09
paladin
noun
1. a knight-errant; a distinguished chamption of a medieval king or prince; as, the paladins of charlemange.
2. a champion on a cause.
PS - i'm going to be a paladin of cancers below the waist on august 29 for north york general's underwear affair 10k run/5k walk... please help me out but using the link in the right sidebar to donate!
noun
1. a knight-errant; a distinguished chamption of a medieval king or prince; as, the paladins of charlemange.
2. a champion on a cause.
PS - i'm going to be a paladin of cancers below the waist on august 29 for north york general's underwear affair 10k run/5k walk... please help me out but using the link in the right sidebar to donate!
thoughts...
i really enjoyed picking my way across the cobblestone walkway of death & goose shit this morning... mostly because it's going to be 20+ and sunny today.
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
thoughts...
i think my eyes are going to pop right out of my head any minute now. i'm just going to put the palms of my hands to my eyes and hold them there until the end of the day.
forgetful jones
pssst... vanessa hudgens, i think you may have forgotten a crucial part of your outfit...
earthy fun facts
earth day was first celebrated on april 22, 1970 in san fransisco. this is its 40th anniversary!
more than 20,000,000 hershey's kisses are wrapped each day, using square miles of tinfoil, all of it recyclable. too bad most people don't realize it...
the first major international conference on environmental issues was held in sweden in 1972 and was sponsered by the united nations.
in many schools, earth day is the third most celebrated holiday, after christmas and halloween. but really, what other holidays are there?
april 22 is also the birthday of julius sterling morton, the founder of arbor day in the usa.
increading herbicide use has created a jungle of at least 48 'super weeds' that are resistant to chemicals.
greenpeace was founded in vancouver in 1971.
more than 20,000,000 hershey's kisses are wrapped each day, using square miles of tinfoil, all of it recyclable. too bad most people don't realize it...
the first major international conference on environmental issues was held in sweden in 1972 and was sponsered by the united nations.
in many schools, earth day is the third most celebrated holiday, after christmas and halloween. but really, what other holidays are there?
april 22 is also the birthday of julius sterling morton, the founder of arbor day in the usa.
increading herbicide use has created a jungle of at least 48 'super weeds' that are resistant to chemicals.
greenpeace was founded in vancouver in 1971.
word of the day - apr 22 09
earth
noun
1. (often initial capital letter) the planet third in order from the sun, having an equatorial diameter of 12,755 km and a polar diameter of 12,714 km, a mean distance from the sun of 149.6 million km, and a period of revolution of 365.26 days, and having one satellite.
2. the inhabitants of this planet, esp. human inhabitants: the whole earth rejoiced.
3. this planet as the habitation of humans, often in contrast to heaven and hell: to create hell on earth.
4. the surface of this planet: to fall to earth.
5. the solid matter of this planet; dry land; ground.
6. soil and dirt, as distinguished from rock and sandl the softer part of the land.
7. the hole of a burrowing animal; lair.
8. chemistry - any of several metallic oxides that are difficult to reduce, as alumina, zirconia, and yttria.
9. also called earth colour. fine arts - any of various pigments consisting chiefly of iron oxides and tending toward brown in hue.
10. chiefly british electronics - a ground.
11. archaic - a land or country.
verb
12. chiefly british electtronics- to ground.
idioms
13. to move heaven and earth
14. on earth, in the world: where on earth have you been?
15. run to earth
noun
1. (often initial capital letter) the planet third in order from the sun, having an equatorial diameter of 12,755 km and a polar diameter of 12,714 km, a mean distance from the sun of 149.6 million km, and a period of revolution of 365.26 days, and having one satellite.
2. the inhabitants of this planet, esp. human inhabitants: the whole earth rejoiced.
3. this planet as the habitation of humans, often in contrast to heaven and hell: to create hell on earth.
4. the surface of this planet: to fall to earth.
5. the solid matter of this planet; dry land; ground.
6. soil and dirt, as distinguished from rock and sandl the softer part of the land.
7. the hole of a burrowing animal; lair.
8. chemistry - any of several metallic oxides that are difficult to reduce, as alumina, zirconia, and yttria.
9. also called earth colour. fine arts - any of various pigments consisting chiefly of iron oxides and tending toward brown in hue.
10. chiefly british electronics - a ground.
11. archaic - a land or country.
verb
12. chiefly british electtronics- to ground.
idioms
13. to move heaven and earth
14. on earth, in the world: where on earth have you been?
15. run to earth
a. hunting - to chase (an animal) into its hole or burrow: to run a fox to earth.
b. to search out; track down: they ran the fugitive to earth in algiers.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
birthday gift ideas
well since my birthday IS right around the corner...
Littlest Pet Shop Portable Pets - Turtle
Littlest Pet Shop Portable Pets - Turtle
children's toy fail
in a toy store... a toy store for children.with beanie babies!
beanie babies from tv shows for toddlers!
giving dumb blondes a bad name
"I hired an acting coach for the day to get me through it because a lot of the lines later on in the episode that I did are very complicated. There are a lot of facts and big words, and I had to say it as if it was coming to me very easily."~ the hills (ugh) useless celebri-twat lauren conrad on getting professional help for her upcoming guest appearance on family guy
weekend project
if you can't get in touch with me this weekend, not to fear... i haven't actually fallen off the face of the planet or become stuck in my toilet. i'll just be hard at work creating these little masterpieces:
gaga, blah blah...
we get it.you love attention.
you hate pants.
please, just admit your are christina aguilera's crazier twin sister and let us get on with our lives! i can't live on the edge like this any longer, waiting to see the more and more obscene ways you continue to top your... 'interesting' fashion choices!
mcdonalds laughs in the face of the recession
let's bankrupt them!so you thought starbucks was mocking the economy with their earth day free coffee, well mcdonalds has gone and one-up-ed them by giving away free coffee for 2 whole weeks!
turns out, starbucks isn't as well off as we thought - they are actually closing some canadian locations! (well, they previously closed a ton of american ones but i don't have the details so i'm just gonna skim over it.)
apparently mcdonalds is trying to steal some of the coffee market away from tim hos... they'll be offering free cups of coffee during breakfast hours at all of their 1400 canadian locations until may 3rd.
so while i may have asked you to go easy on starbucks because of their seemingly eco-friendly agenda, i strongly urge you to drink as much free mcdonalds coffee as humanly possible between now and may 3rd. alternatively, if you are a non-coffee drinker, you should merely obtain and pour out your free beverages.
and it's not that i'm anti-mcdonalds & pro-timmys or vice versa... i'm not even a coffee drinker! i just find making corporations' schemes backfire on them highly amusing.
return to the city of townsville
from a post dated thursday july 24, 2008:
you know that episode of the powerpuff girls where they try to make a new sister and she comes out horribly deformed and they name her 'bunny' and she jumps around yelling "bunneh, bunneh, bunneh!" and can't blink her eyes in unison? what do mean you don't know that episode? you don't know what a powerpuff girl is? you're useless... here's a visual to help you out:
yeah well, i was mistaken when i labelled liv tyler's sister mia as 'bunneh!;... i would say the title more suitable belongs to khloe kardashian.
sing it with me now...
one of these things is not like the others,
one of these things just doesn't belong,
can you tell which thing is not like the others
by the time i finish my song?
word of the day - apr 21 09
quiddity
noun
1. the essence, nature, or distinctive perculiarity of a thing.
2. a hairsplitting distinction; a trifling point; a quibble.
3. an eccentricity; an odd feature.
noun
1. the essence, nature, or distinctive perculiarity of a thing.
2. a hairsplitting distinction; a trifling point; a quibble.
3. an eccentricity; an odd feature.
Monday, April 20, 2009
coming home...
starting tomorrow, i will officially be back at blogger!
for now, it remains unblocked so i will take full advantage!
so we say so long, farewell, auf weidersehen, adieu to eblogus...
for now, it remains unblocked so i will take full advantage!
so we say so long, farewell, auf weidersehen, adieu to eblogus...
broken
with less than an hour left in the day, i managed to break my autocad... i can't delete things, i can't edit text, and who knows what else the program-of-programs won't let me do. all i wanted to do was align a viewport in this one drawing and now i can't do anything in any drawing! le sigh...
recession? what recession?
so it appears that starbucks isn't struggling in economic wind... while other companies are being forced into mergers or shutting down altogether and people are losing their jobs & houses, starbucks is thriving so much so that they can afford to give away free coffee for a whole day!on earth day (march 22) if you bring your travel mug (i assume it has to be a starbucks-approved, genuine starbucks product... just try getting your timmy's mug filled there!) into your nearest starbucks and they'll fill it up for free.
now normally i would say everyone and their uncle and their uncle's uncle should get their asses to their nearest starbucks to see if it was possible to bankrupt starbucks but taking gross advantage of their good will gesture... buuuuuut... they ARE trying to promote awareness about earth day and being nice to the environment... and seriously, how can you be against the environment? i'm all for travel mugs and reusable grocery bags and the like but with my brain seriously resembling a sieve, i can never remember mine!
so let's just go easy on the pretentious soul-suckers at starbucks this earth day... hey and if you can't make it out on earth day, they've also promised that if you bring your travel mug in on any other day, they'll knock 10 cents off the price of your drink.
theives!
the math just doesn't work out here...in case you're having a hard time reading my little picture, the gist of the gripe is this:
tickets - 2 x $15.00
building facility charge - 2 x $1.50 (wtf?)
convinence charge - 2 x $7.50 (not very convenient)
VIP parking pass - $10.00 (parking normally costs $15+ so we're saving money here)
order processing charge - $4.25
ticketfast delivery - $2.50 (for the honour of printing my own tickets)
grand total - $64.85
the extra charges nearly amount to the price of the tickets! how effing retarded is that? and what, you ask, is even more retarded? that this is the only place to get the tickets. as my mom would say, "up your nose with a rubber hose!"
too bad because i'd erally enjoying seeing USS again. if you and your shiny mercedes can afford to see these guys live then i highly suggest you do it! they made a smoothie on the freaking stage for crying out loud!
thoughts...
i really should have looked harder for my umbrella this morning... odds are that it is actually in the trunk of my car.
Friday, April 17, 2009
thoughts...
if 'the crazy' is a genetic disorder, please just shoot me when i first start showing the signs.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
B.G.C.
(that's big gay cake in case you were wondering. please don't spit on me for my naming choice... my friend who was at the meal where i served this cake and also happens to be gay exclaimed that i brought a special 'big gay cake' just for him! the name kinda stuck and it shall now and forever be known as the big gay cake or BGC.)
i got the idea here: http://www.omnomicon.com/rainbowcake
the girl there is all on about weight watchers cake but i couldn't be bothered - if you're going to eat cake, it might as well be fattening. i used the directions on the package.
for more stuff about my BGC (among other delicious things) you can check out my squidoo lens called my virtual recipe box.
i got the idea here: http://www.omnomicon.com/rainbowcakethe girl there is all on about weight watchers cake but i couldn't be bothered - if you're going to eat cake, it might as well be fattening. i used the directions on the package.
for more stuff about my BGC (among other delicious things) you can check out my squidoo lens called my virtual recipe box.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
well i'll be a monkey's auntie!
back from a 5-day long weekend in moncton (the province summer forgot) new brunswick and lo and behold blogger.com remains unblocked! i'm as flabbergasted as you! hopefully this spot of sunshine will last long enough for me to be able to have something to write about... currently i'm busy planning a retirement party for the end of this week. i've done more work on that today than i did on actually work all last week and the day is just flying by. anyhoo, keep your fingers crossed for continued non-blockage of my favourite blog site. ;)
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
holey rusted metal batman!
what's this?
blogger... allowed... at work?
i'm in shock and awe!
i was searching something else on the interwebs and a blogspot sight came up with a green check mark next to it instead of that satanic red x... i thought maybe i was hallucinating so i clicked through and it actually worked! so i was like why not try and log on??
but let's not get too, too excited here. there was that one day way back in the day where for one magical day, facebook wasn't blocked... that turned out to be one big misunderstanding. say, i wonder if facebook works today?!? no... sadly not.
stay tuned to see if this is going to be permanent or if this is one of those cinderella one night only things. here's me crossing my finger and hoping against hope that i can come back home! i'm sick of the eblogus hotel - it smells funny and i think i saw a spider!
blogger... allowed... at work?
i'm in shock and awe!
i was searching something else on the interwebs and a blogspot sight came up with a green check mark next to it instead of that satanic red x... i thought maybe i was hallucinating so i clicked through and it actually worked! so i was like why not try and log on??
but let's not get too, too excited here. there was that one day way back in the day where for one magical day, facebook wasn't blocked... that turned out to be one big misunderstanding. say, i wonder if facebook works today?!? no... sadly not.
stay tuned to see if this is going to be permanent or if this is one of those cinderella one night only things. here's me crossing my finger and hoping against hope that i can come back home! i'm sick of the eblogus hotel - it smells funny and i think i saw a spider!
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