screw being diplomatic, let's make fun of other languages!

World's Sexiest Named Dinosaur

what's important

on this list of the world's greatest inventions, #1 should have been "taking things for granted" or "ignorance"
i don't know what sample of vapid idiots they polled for this list but they should probably all be sterilized.

here are a few of the inventions and their rankings:

1. wheel
8. iphone
11. contraceptive pill
16. steam engine
22. toilet paper
24. google
29. hot water (does that even count??)
34. hair straighteners
39. space travel
42. bed
66. make-up
69. the game of football
82. facebook

i suggest checking out the whole list to see what outranked what...

change is slow...

"I think the internal combustion engine will disappear from the streets of our cities in the next thirty years because transportation will be mass transportation, or probably electrical power."

~ Gaylord Nelson, date unknown

world's worst weather predictor predicts more winter

shubenacadie sam, punxsutawney phil, and ontario's own wiarton willie are all predicting 6 more weeks of winter.

in the ceremony where the chubby critters unceremoniously (HA! see what i did there? unceremoniously in a ceremony! oh come on... work with me here!) dragged from their burrows, all 3 of the famous groundhogs saw their shadows indicating that was should hunker down and prepare for another 6 weeks of winter.

but if you preemptively got out your shorts and tank tops hoping for an early spring, don't be too hasty in putting them away... a study by the US national climatic data center says that between 1988 and 2002 punxsutawney phil saw his shadow ten times... but seven of those years featured above average temperatures for february and march.

thinking things through logically, it IS only the second day of february... groundhog prediction aside, we are already guaranteed AT LEAST 4 more weeks of winter. that extra two weeks isn't that unbearable considering that we've had major snowfalls into april in the past. besides, who in canada is fool enough to be thinking spring is just around the corner in february?

50 years of pop, pop, pop...

who knew!?!
bubble wrap turns 50 this year!

did you know that, aside from pictures of rolls of bubble wrap, one of the most common images that comes up when you search for bubble wrap is a woman in a bubble wrap bikini? makes for a not-so-work-appropriate search...

anyway!

"The product once envisioned as a new type of wallpaper turns 50 this month, and enthusiasts' obsession with it has spawned 250 Facebook pages devoted to Bubble Wrap."

yes, because nothing says legitimacy like facebook groups... and if not that, then an iphone app!

"Then there's the true badge of hipness: A bubble-popping application for Apple's iPhone. A piece of Bubble Wrap appears onscreen and you pop as many bubbles as you can in 45 seconds."

i actually played this on a friend's super-phone and it was appallingly addictive...

Bubble wrap hits 50
A genuine pop, pop, pop culture icon

sunny day, sweepin' the clouds away

if you happened to drop by the google site today, you might have noticed that they changed their logo to commemorate a rather special occasion...sesame street is celebrating its 40th anniversary!
in an episode that will air november 10th, michelle obama will make an appearance with elmo encoraging kids to eat well and exercise. yeah... good luck with that!

this show was so much better way back when times were simpler and being politically correct didn't override content... and also when there wasn't 1 million & 1 spin-offs, specials, and more such as:
a sesame street christmas carol
elmo's potty time
sesame street: friends to the rescue
sesame street: three bears and a new baby
(on a semi-related note, did you hear that they're thinking of making a three men and a baby sequel???)
sesame street visits the firehouse
don't eat the pictures: sesame street at the metropolitan museum of art
christmas eve on sesame street

galileo's telescope turns 400

"Four hundred years ago Galileo gave birth to modern astronomy with the humblest of instruments, now preserved at a history of science museum in Florence, Italy. A one-and-a-half-inch lens displayed in an ornate frame was ground in 1609. Other followed. Fitted into simple wooden tubes just a few feet long, Galileo's lenses magnified the heavens, bringing Earth's moon, sunspots, and nearby planets into focus."

i highly suggest checking out the telescope timeline that national geographic is also featuring.

least likely pairing of the day

snoop dog and...

...

...

wait for it...

...

...

buzz aldrin!

and now you're all like, "buzz who?"
buzz aldrin! legenday runner-up (aka loser) in the first-man-on-the-moon contest!
well neil armstrong's (another space cowboy, not that man in the yellow spandax) homeboy is now snoop dog's homeboy!
in the worst attempt ever to make space travel sexy and cool, the unlikely duo is working on a rap, entitled "rocket experience", for the 40th anniversary of the biggest stage production in american history - the moon landing!

i tell the story 'bout my time on the moon now
the sky was black even though the sun shine down
moonwalking's such a trip, it's so fine
when you're walking in the lunar dust

did i mention that mr. aldrin is 79?!?
craziness...

i declare myselt emperor of blogville!

ok, no, not really... but go ahead and google the shit out of this guy:
Joshua Abraham Norton --> self-proclaimed His Imperial Majesty Emperor Norton I, 'Emporer of these United States' and 'Protector of Mexico'!

if he can proclaim all that, then certainly i can proclaim myself lord and master of the whole internet and still get away with it...

in the words of Joseph Goebbels: "If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it."

say it ain't so...

"Archie spurns Betty to wed Veronica"
'Is this the end of Archie Comics?' fans wonder

After nearly seven decades of waffling, Archie Andrews has finally decided to end pop culture's most famous love triangle.

His bride-to-be? Snooty brunette Veronica Lodge.

The issue was put to debate. The publishers decided. Issue # 600 will feature the former freckle-faced high-school klutz on bended knee with a ring in his hand. Veronica screams out "Yes!" while Betty stands in the background wiping away a tear.yet further proof that boys are idiots...

broaden your mind

the setup: here's the story that gets it all started...

"I'm no Nazi, says mom of 7-year-old with swastika"
Manitoba mother now fighting to get kids back after seizure by province

long story short (well, not that short) - the kid went to school with a swastika drawn on her arm and people freaked out leading child services to removed the children (the 7-year-old as well as a 2-year-old) from the home. there are allegation of poor "behavious and associations" as well as drug/alcohol use in the home but that infor came out after the children had been removed due to the swastika incident. the woman did confess herself to have a personal belief in white pride... i'm not condoning white pride but, since when does the government have sway on how you raise your kids? and when did political beliefs become cause for taking children into protective custody?

the real point: the swastika has bad publicity
the nazis in WWII ruined it for everybody. well, at least everyone in the western world... it is still used all over asia (and in many other societies and cultures) as a symbol of good luck. the meaning of the word swastika comes from the sanskrit svastik, meaning any lucky or auspicious object. [source]

check out this buddhist temple in korea:

fauntleroy?

happy birthday goes out to donald fauntleroy duck today on this, the day of my daughter's wedding... no wait! on his 74th birthday!

"Donald's birthday is officially recognized as June 9, 1934, the day his debut film, The Wise Little Hen, was released."

[source]

WARNING: extreme sense of humour needed

so my dad, being the humourist he is, has declared today, may 30th, to be International BBQ Day...

"In a bow to the pre-eminence of French cuisine, May 30th has been declared International Barbeque Day; acknowledging the events of 577 years ago today in Rouen, France."

scratching you head at the meaning? yeah... not being the world's greatest historian, that was me too. to save you the hassle of finding out for yourself, below is a link that might help you out.

click here only in you have a wry sense of twisted humour in place...

this day in history

so we've already established the most important thing that happened on this auspicious day (see previous post) but what else has happen on MAY 8th of years past?

1794 - french chemist antoine lavoisier is tried, convicated, and guillotined all in one day!

1877 - new york city, the first westminster kennel club dog show opens.

1886 - pharmacist john styth pemberton invents a carbonated beverage that would later be named "coca-cola"...

1906 - italian director roberto rossellini born

1920 - finnish fetish artist tom of finland born

1926 - american comedian don rickles born

1944 - english singer gary glitter born

1945 - v-e day: combat in europe ends in WWII

1983 - say hello to ME!

meanwhile, at the MENSA convention

"5th-grader finds 27-year-old Smithsonian mistake"

ha ha... all are you smarter than a 5th grader jokes aside...

"On a winter break trip [...] the 11-year-old southwestern Michigan boy noticed that a notation, in bold lettering, mistakenly identified the Precambrian as an era."

and just so you know, in academic circles, mistakenly indentifing something as an era is just as bad if not worse than showing up to an event in the same dress as someone else.

the boy and his father noted the mistake on a comment card on the way out and last week they recieved a letter saying he was "spot on."

the smithsonian tried to downplay their blunder saying that department staff had noticed it back in the day and it bugged them but i guess they were just to lazy to paint over the word "era" which is the current solution being employed now.

in another move of shear brilliance, the museum addressed the kid's letter to "Kenton Slufflebeam"... that's MR. sTufflebeam to you!

going for gold

"Flurries could make winter 3rd snowiest"

go blow it out your ass! this is retarded!
winter is officially over according to the calendar so quite it with the cold and snow already! i'm getting twitchy eye just thinking about more snow.
it was a GREAT (can you smell the sarcasm? is it dripping from your monitor?) practical joke yesterday when i had to clear off my car but once is enough, ok?
take your mother-f*cking snow and go to antactica... i hear the ice and snow there is melting - they'd appreciate some more.

this winter's accumulation, including yesterday's dusting, is sitting at 189 cm...
here's the shake down of the top 3:

3. 1964-65 --> 190.6 cm

2. 1949-50 --> 196.4 cm

and the big winner... or loser... however you want to look at it...

1. 1938-39 --> 207.4 cm

with the projected snow for today and overnight into tomorrow, looks like we'll at least capture the bronze medal.

holy f-bomb batman!

"Castro resigns Cuban presidency"

quoth alyssa:
Whoah...
Hard to believe.
I admire that man more than Jesus

because i'm a GIANT nerd...

The History of Ontario's King's Highways

on top of the world

"Sir Edmund Hillary, 88: Adventurer conquered Everset"
Legendary mountaineer also stood tall as a humble philanthropist who built schools, clinics in Nepal

going to the other place in the sky...

rest in peace.

who's the birthday boy???

it's david brewster, inventor of the kaleidoscope!

mr. brewster was born on this day in 1781 in jedburgh scotland.