no. thank. you.

behold the aptly named 'Insano' waterslide at the beach park in porto das dunas, brazil. it towers over other waterslides at a record of 41m - that's the same as a 14-storey building! the website describes the ride as having "an extremely rapid descent"... but really, is 105km/h really THAT fast? nah...

phoenix gets dusted

this can't be good...

check out more pictures: Another dust storm in Arizona

belarus: full of elderly prudes?

ok, so that sounds overly inflammatory i suppose... but that's just what this story makes me think. i know people have different ideas in different parts of the world and north america IS just a giant cesspool of filth and immorality... being a "liberal young person," this kind of thing just brings out the shit-disturbing activist in me.

Belarus officials fear promotion of gay lifestyle at Elton John gig 

Officials in Belarus have asked the organizers of an upcoming Elton John concert in Minsk to prevent the promotion of homosexuality.

The Public Council for Morality is to study recordings of earlier performances by the British singer to make sure “they have no elements inconsistent with the law and morality,” the head of the organization said.

“We have requested the organizers of the concert to give us records of Elton John’s earlier performances,” he said.

[what? they don't have youtube?] 

Nikolai Cherginets said the Council is particularly concerned over the openly gay singer’s statement in an interview with a U.S. magazine that Jesus was a "super-intelligent gay man."

[ok, that might be poking the bear *snicker* a little much for the churchies, elton...] 

Elton John will play at the Minsk Arena on June 26 as part of his European summer tour.

Sexual minorities have become active in the country of late and “even attempted to hold a gay parade in Minsk,” Cherginets said. The attempted parade was broken up by police.

Cherginets said the Council had already prevented outbreaks of “immorality” during a May concert by German industrial metal band Rammstein in the Belarusian capital.

“If we had not interfered, there would have been sex on stage and the relief of physical needs right in front of the audience,” the official said.

[heavens! not the relief of physical needs!] 

The Public Council for Morality was established in 2009 by the Belarusian Orthodox Church and the Writers Union of Belarus, with the support of President Alexander Lukashenko.

let them eat cake meat

The World's Most Carnivorous Countries

1. Denmark (321 lbs)

According to the Food and Agriculture Organization of the United Nations, the average Dane devours 321 lbs. of meat a year.

2. New Zealand (313 lbs)
3. Luxembourg (312 lbs)
4. Cyprus (289 lbs)
5. USA! USA! USA! (275 lbs)

damn, USA! you got out-meated by luxembourg?
LUXEMBOURG!!!
it's one of the smallest nations in the world!
i guess the difference between the US and luxembourg is that americans will keep 200 of those pounds on their bodies in fat while luxembourgians (???) will work it all off...

smiles!

did you know...?

apparently, if you lose your balloon at disneyland you can go to city hall on main street and tell them what happened, you'll get a voucher for a replacement balloon! no more tears!

the morlocks are coming...

Giant Guatemalan Sinkhole

wondering why it's so round?
here's a little insight.

let them eat cake dirt

Indonesian village snacks on soil for better health
In Indonesia, soil is not just a raw material for bricks and ceramics, it's also a snack that one family has been making for generations.

Tuban, in East Java Province, is the only village that produces "ampo," a snack made from clean, gravel-free dark earth collected from nearby paddy fields.

Although there is no medical evidence, villagers believe the soil snacks are an effective pain-killer and pregnant women are encouraged to eat them as it is believed to refine the skin of the unborn baby.

There is no real recipe: makers of the snack use a wooden stick to pound the soil into a hard, solid mass.

Rolls of dirt are then scraped off the with a bamboo dagger, baked and smoked in large clay pot for half and hour and then they're ready to serve.

a vacation fit for a king sewer rat

ok, hotels are pretty much the same no matter where you go... the furniture, the linens, the lamp... and WHERE do they ALL get that same picture that hangs over the bed?!?

well, if you're sick of getting that deja vu feeling every time you check into a hotel, i have the perfect vacation destination for you... oh yeah, and you should probably be a huge ninja turtle fan to appreciate this as well.

welcome to the Das Park Hotel located in linz, austria:

here your room is a sewer pipe that has been re-imagined as a bedroom and snugly fits a double bed. amenities such as food and bathroom are provided at the nearby hotel complex.

for more unique hotels, take a gander here:
8 of the Weirdest Hotels on Earth

oh, canada...

is anyone else a little mortified to be canadian after last night's olympic closing ceremonies?

it was bad enough that they kicked off the entire show with a clown!
i should have called it quits right then... unfortunately, that would have meant missing delightful appearances by bill shatner and michael j. fox so i'm sort of glad i kept the tv on.

i think we poked a little too much fun at ourselves and we should be ashamed. if a foreign country was asked to produce a musical that reeked of canadiana, this is what would be produced... wait, was this an outsourced production?
a choreographed ballet with giant beavers and mounties?
what? no igloos?!?

and then the much anticipated and speculated over musical extravaganza... who the mother ficus was in charge of that shitstorm???

1) ok, neil young. yes, he's the canadian man in black. everyone was fine with that.

2) i don't think ANY canadian ever in the history of the world wanted us to showcase on an international stage that our country is responsible for nickelback... i think the roar of disapproval when they came on was louder than than cheers when mr. crosby scored that last goal.

3) and if you thought it couldn't get more nationally degrading than nickelback, boy were you ever wrong. the travesty continued as they let the high school dropout from napanee play not one but TWO songs!

5) alright, i'll admit. alanis looked AMAZING!

4) the show organizers get bonus marks for including k-os to bring a little diversity to the party but was he really the right note to end on?

5) apparently not because then they brought out some crazy french band literally playing garbage! i was really hoping they'd knock everyone's socks off and end with the tragically hip or the guess who... that would have been just enough to salvage the entire dreadful evening.

oh well, maybe we'll make a better showing next time we are permitted to hold the world's most prestigious sporting event... if there is a next time.

and you thought the body scanners were bad...

"Security at Pearson more like harassment, expert says"

so this purported 'guru' of airport security doesn't like the way pearson is being run. apparently he also helped design the security system at the highly successful ben gurion airport in tel aviv. anyway, he's got all these marvelous suggestions on how to make toronto's major airport a better place to fly. the airport can be more efficient using "'security circles,' layers of surveillance that screen travellers well before they reach the security gate."

ZONE 1
electronic 'gateways' with cameras and licence plate recognition, similar to 407's electronic toll system, would be used to single out stolen cars and anyone with outstanding warrants. 'sniffing technologies' would be used to search for drugs and explosives.

what about terrorists who don't steal cars or have outstanding warrants? what about normal people with warrants for things like outstanding parking tickets? what about all those cars circling the airport waiting to pick people up? what about the fact that the 407 system is not perfect and routinely misses cars entering/exiting the highway...?

ZONE 2
at airport entrances, uniformed and undercover analysts and video cameras assess the behaviour of people entering the airport. apparently, simple things like "looking nervous or sweating" makes you a terrorist...

what about people who are nervous about flying? don't like crowds? have never been to the airport before? all these things could easily have you getting an invasive cavity search in an intimidating white room.

ZONE 3
passengers are further behaviourally analyzed as they check in at automatic kiosks. fingerprinting, face and iris recognition, typing rhythm and voice intonation will be analyzed. this airport expert guy says that "99.99% of the bad people have already been caught" by this point in the process.

yeah, 99.99% of the bad people have been caught but so have 99.99% of the normal people! anyone is bound to be nervous and display abnormal behaviour knowing that they are under so much scrutiny! i get paranoid when the people i travel with are joking about bombs, etc. at the airport! i keep telling them, "you can't use those words at an airport! they are going to come for you any minute now!"

ZONE 4
a passenger's identity, boarding and baggage information are all digitally cross-checked before they get on the plane. the expert guy says that currently "there's nothing to stop a passenger from obtaining multiple boarding passes and then deciding at the last minute what flight to board."

ok, this last step sound the most beneficial for security and the least stressful for the passengers... but what about the people who are flying standby?

i'm not saying the system at pearson isn't broken, far from it actually, but i don't think a system like this is necessarily the best idea. and i'm not even suggesting anything better... sure, maybe you'll catch 99.99% of the bad guys but you'll also mistakenly hold up the same percentage of people who are no threat at all. travelling from toronto is a hassle and does take extra time but at least you're not very likely to be detained and treated like a criminal because the airport makes you nervous.

master of your own domain

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to buy a title? For as little as £29.99 you can buy a noble title and your very own plot of land on an estate in Lochaber, in the Scottish Highlands. As a Scottish land owner with a Laird Title, Lord Title or Lady Title you will be privileged to style yourself Laird, Lady or Lord of Lochaber.

The Laird title is the Scottish form of a Lord title, meaning "land owner" and by purchasing one of our range of plots you will become owner of your very own Highland Estate and entitled to use your Lord title whenever you wish - you choose how large an estate you want to own. Joint estates are available for couples.

christmas idea, anyone?

yes yes!

detroit - challenging oshawa for classiest city in the world.

"Food stamps swapped for booze, Viagra"

DETROIT (AP) — Viagra and pornography are not staples on the government’s food stamp list. But authorities say a Detroit store supplied them during a series of illegal deals.

Federal prosecutors filed fraud charges this week against three people who worked at Jefferson’s Liquor Palace.

The alleged scheme worked this way: Food stamp recipients would get cash from the store in exchange for swiping larger amounts off their electronic cards. The store would then be reimbursed by the U.S. Agriculture Department.

But in some transactions, the government the store provided informants Viagra, liquor and porn in exchange for swiping about $2,000 off food stamp cards.

The government says fraud at the store topped $130,000 over 21/2 years. The store is closed.

keepin' it klassy

way to go oshawa! you be representin'!

back in action

back to the grind after soaking up all the quaint on the east coast for the past couple of days...

you know what's the best about long weekend? the short work weeks preceeding or following them... the next weekend is a mere 2 days away!

PEI update

apparently, JAPANESE people are REALLY into being quaint and anne of green gables because they are EVERYWHERE here on this sparsely populated island... no word on if they like potatoes yet...

murder? i call it initiative

"TV host accused of killing for ratings"
Politician suspected of ordering hits on rivals for crime show

SAO PAULO, BRAZIL–In one murder after another, the Canal Livre TV show had an uncanny knack for being first on the scene, gathering graphic footage of the victim.

Too uncanny, say police, who are investigating the show's host, state legislator and accused drug trafficker Wallace Souza, on suspicion of commissioning at least five of the murders to boost his ratings and prove his claim that Brazil's Amazon region is awash in violent crime.

what kills me (haha... see what i did there?) about this story is that this guy is a tv show personality, a state legislator, an accused drug trafficker, and a former police officer! talk about a jack of all trades! did you know that as a state legislator in brazil you have immunity from being arrested?

but seriously kids, killing people is bad. don't do it.

a bright future in international meteorology

"Until the 1960s, British law decreed that someone found guilty of trying to predict the weather could be burned at the stake.

In the 1990s, the Taliban banned weather forecasting in Afghanistan, calling it sorcery.

Thailand's chief meteorologist was fired for failing to predict the 2004 tsunami. Ironically, the country's previous top weatherman had been fired six years earlier for warning that the southwest coast might face a deadly tsunami.

In 1996, Peruvian meteorologist Francisco Arias Olivera was hanged from a tree by an angry mob after a flash flood killed 17 people. He had predicted 50 millimetres of rain in 24 hours but the town was bombarded with 480 in 12 hours."

[source]

warning: plane crossing

did you know...?

gibraltar airport, near spain, is the only airport where the runway actually intersects a major highway! traffic is shut down whenever a plane has to take off or land.

report: kids these days, definitely dumber

"Texting teen falls into manhole"

She was texting and walking when it happened.

"I fell in a hole," Alexa Longueira said.

The Travis resident laughs about it now, but when the accident happened, it was a shock.

She was walking along Victory Boulevard about to read a text message on her girlfriend's cell phone when the sidewalk was suddenly gone

"Like, there was no warning about a big, open hole," she said.

It was a big, open manhole.

Alexa tumbled six feet underground and landed in four inches of raw sewage.

"A manhole. My kid falls down a manhole," Kim Longueira, said.

In a word, Alexa's mother says it was horrible.

"She was smelly," she said.

Alexa also had cuts across her arms and down her back.

They know it could have been worse if the sewer had been full or if Alexa had hit her head.

Workers on the scene told Kim they had left the manhole unattended in order to get cones to mark it off. "DEP is conducting a full investigation of what happened during a manhole incident on Victory Blvd. where workers were flushing a high-pressure sewer on Wednesday evening. We regret that this happened and wish the young woman a speedy recovery," said DEP spokesperson Mercedes Padilla.

apparently this is BIG news is travis...
there's a whole serious, serious news report on it!
and you should REALLY make time in your busy schedule to watch it and value and revel in your superior intelligence.

but as much as that kid deserved to get dumped down a hole into sewage, the mom is the real star of the show:
"a manhole... how could my kid fall down a manhole?"
"she was smelly."

and another strange thing: did you know that statten island has a place called 'Freshkills Park'? what the eff kind of name is that for a park?!? sounds like a lovely place to take the family... "say honey, instead of going to the movies this afternoon, how's about we take the kids to freshkills park and let them run around?"

foreign cuisine

when i heard this story on the radio this morning, i just knew i had to find it and post it! i mean, how could i not? it's just too... too... too something. i can't quite put my finger on it.

"China puts a stop to snake-bitten cock-in-a-pot"

BEIJING (Reuters) – Chinese health authorities are putting a stop to restaurants serving chickens which have been bitten to death by poisonous snakes and cooked up for a supposedly detoxing meal.

The dish, served by a small number of eateries in the southern province of Guangdong and the southwestern city of Chongqing, has generated a storm of publicity and controversy in the Chinese media and amongst bloggers.

A video showing a cook holding a snake and forcing it to bite a live chicken until it dies has been widely circulated online, generating mainly angry comments.