egress
noun
1. the act of going out or leaving, or the right or freedom to leave; departure.
2. a means of going out or leaving; an exit; an outlet.
3. to go out; to depart; to leave.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
the move approaches
geezes! it's been busy around here this morning!
it's like today is the first time everyone ever heard that we were moving and now they're all running around in a panic like chickens with their heads cut off! 3 months of packing condensed into 1.5 days... this is possibly going to be the worst move in the history of the world.
alas, the people are coming soon to take away our precious computers! what are we to do with out computers? it's archatic i tell you! who knows what's going down tomorrow... it's akin to a wasted day. maybe they'll just tell us all to go home? highly unlikely.
it's like today is the first time everyone ever heard that we were moving and now they're all running around in a panic like chickens with their heads cut off! 3 months of packing condensed into 1.5 days... this is possibly going to be the worst move in the history of the world.
alas, the people are coming soon to take away our precious computers! what are we to do with out computers? it's archatic i tell you! who knows what's going down tomorrow... it's akin to a wasted day. maybe they'll just tell us all to go home? highly unlikely.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
word of the day - jul 30 08
tarradiddle
noun
1. a petty falsehood; a fib.
2. pretentious nonsense.
that previous post was complete tarradiddle.
it's a direct line to the CEO in charge of dicking around.
noun
1. a petty falsehood; a fib.
2. pretentious nonsense.
that previous post was complete tarradiddle.
it's a direct line to the CEO in charge of dicking around.
picture of the week - jul 30 08
here's a picture of the one and only phone in the new office:
it's a direct line to the director of no-one-gives-a-shit.
go thoughts...
i'm thinking of becoming a jemima's witness...
have you accepted pancakes as your personal savoury?
have you accepted pancakes as your personal savoury?
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
down mexico way
"Toronto a hot spot for Mexican tourists"
When the writers for the racy Mexican soap opera Tormenta en el Paraiso ("Storms in Paradise") decided to send their heroine abroad, only one backdrop came to mind - the CN Tower.
(although, that was probably because the US had some sort of opposition to mexicans working in THEIR country... taking jobs for deserving american lazy-asses! it's just ain't patriotic! they don't take to kindly to strangers in them parts)
This past May, the show's 9.5 million viewers watched the lissome adventurer from Mexico tour the Royal Ontario Museum, study English at the University of Toronto, eat street meat, go shopping and brave the CN Tower's glass floor.
The city's TV exposure down south is likely to bolster an already booming market from Mexican tourists. Since 2004, Toronto-bound travel from Mexico has increased by 50 per cent.
the americans would have you believe that the only reason they'd come up here is to sneak into the states from the north where the immigrant watch is not as vigilant. so not only do americans have to needlessly worry about terrorists sneaking in from canada, they now have to worry about canadian tourist mexicans too!
too bad canadian/american television can't reciprocate for mexico's tourist industry... anytime you see a character going to mexico, they are inevitably going for drugs, or guns, or drugs, or money, or drugs. oh and don't forget the drugs! and you gotta know someone is going to die if the show take a detour down south. hurrah mexican tourism!
When the writers for the racy Mexican soap opera Tormenta en el Paraiso ("Storms in Paradise") decided to send their heroine abroad, only one backdrop came to mind - the CN Tower.
(although, that was probably because the US had some sort of opposition to mexicans working in THEIR country... taking jobs for deserving american lazy-asses! it's just ain't patriotic! they don't take to kindly to strangers in them parts)
This past May, the show's 9.5 million viewers watched the lissome adventurer from Mexico tour the Royal Ontario Museum, study English at the University of Toronto, eat street meat, go shopping and brave the CN Tower's glass floor.
The city's TV exposure down south is likely to bolster an already booming market from Mexican tourists. Since 2004, Toronto-bound travel from Mexico has increased by 50 per cent.
the americans would have you believe that the only reason they'd come up here is to sneak into the states from the north where the immigrant watch is not as vigilant. so not only do americans have to needlessly worry about terrorists sneaking in from canada, they now have to worry about canadian tourist mexicans too!
too bad canadian/american television can't reciprocate for mexico's tourist industry... anytime you see a character going to mexico, they are inevitably going for drugs, or guns, or drugs, or money, or drugs. oh and don't forget the drugs! and you gotta know someone is going to die if the show take a detour down south. hurrah mexican tourism!
for john...
a fun story about john's favourite television show ever aired.
"'Makeover' house faces foreclosure"
More than 1,800 people showed up to help ABC's "Extreme Makeover" team demolish a family's decrepit home and replace it with a sparkling, four-bedroom mini-mansion in 2005.
Three years later, the reality TV show's most ambitious project at the time has become the latest victim of the foreclosure crisis.
dopes took out a HUGE loan using the house as collateral for a shitty business that fell flat. i wonder if they also spent the money the community raised and the kid's college funds...?
"'Makeover' house faces foreclosure"
More than 1,800 people showed up to help ABC's "Extreme Makeover" team demolish a family's decrepit home and replace it with a sparkling, four-bedroom mini-mansion in 2005.
Three years later, the reality TV show's most ambitious project at the time has become the latest victim of the foreclosure crisis.
dopes took out a HUGE loan using the house as collateral for a shitty business that fell flat. i wonder if they also spent the money the community raised and the kid's college funds...?
word of the day - jul 29 08
soporific
adjective
1. causing sleep; tending to cause sleep.
2. of, relating to, or characterized by sleepiness or lethargy.
gawd, eating even a portion of that muffin was soporific.
adjective
1. causing sleep; tending to cause sleep.
2. of, relating to, or characterized by sleepiness or lethargy.
gawd, eating even a portion of that muffin was soporific.
thoughts...
do you know what it feels like to eat a 520 calorie muffin?
well i don't... i couldn't finish it!
every time i thought about it, i inevitably thought of it as '520 pounds' instead of '520 calories'
i think that's what it would feel like to finish it - eating 520 pounds.
and it's not even big! it's small and dense. oh so dense. like a dark matter muffin!
well i don't... i couldn't finish it!
every time i thought about it, i inevitably thought of it as '520 pounds' instead of '520 calories'
i think that's what it would feel like to finish it - eating 520 pounds.
and it's not even big! it's small and dense. oh so dense. like a dark matter muffin!
Monday, July 28, 2008
word of the day - jul 28 08
mephitic
adjective
1. offensive to the smell; as, mephitic odours.
2. poisonous; noxious.
so, my office still stinks like a bog threw up in here...
moving day countdown: 5 days to go!
adjective
1. offensive to the smell; as, mephitic odours.
2. poisonous; noxious.
so, my office still stinks like a bog threw up in here...
moving day countdown: 5 days to go!
a giant leap for feminism
a giant leap backward...
i'm not usually all about 'girl power' and the like... i don't spew it like an erupting volcano but still...i believe in equal rights and treatment. it's just something about this alanis morissette quote just rubs me the wrong way. i think it's a bad association for the word 'feminine' and a bad stance to take on being a woman.
"I have spent most of the life behaving like a man. I had money, power and I wanted to control everything. I would be the one slamming down my credit card at the end of a meal and opening the door so the man didn't have to. It's just not attractive. It's not how a woman should behave.
I am getting back in touch with my feminine side. I dress to show off my curves rather than hide them with boy clothes, I let men help me down steps and I sit back and wait for the man to pay for dinner. I may have more money, but I don't need to prove it by being in control all the time. It's nice. It makes me feel sexier and more feminine."
i'm not usually all about 'girl power' and the like... i don't spew it like an erupting volcano but still...i believe in equal rights and treatment. it's just something about this alanis morissette quote just rubs me the wrong way. i think it's a bad association for the word 'feminine' and a bad stance to take on being a woman.
"I have spent most of the life behaving like a man. I had money, power and I wanted to control everything. I would be the one slamming down my credit card at the end of a meal and opening the door so the man didn't have to. It's just not attractive. It's not how a woman should behave.
I am getting back in touch with my feminine side. I dress to show off my curves rather than hide them with boy clothes, I let men help me down steps and I sit back and wait for the man to pay for dinner. I may have more money, but I don't need to prove it by being in control all the time. It's nice. It makes me feel sexier and more feminine."
Friday, July 25, 2008
in other news...
after cleaning out my office area today in preparation for the BIG MOVE i threw out a whole bunch of stuff and put all my precious belongings into a big packing box. my stuff looks so small and lonely sitting in the bottom of the box, barely filling it...
but now my work station looks almost like it did when i moved in over a year ago!
but now my work station looks almost like it did when i moved in over a year ago!
tgif... why isn't it the end of f yet?
sweet baby jesus in the manger...
why isn't it friday home time yet?
i'm putting my head down on my desk - wake me before everyone leaves.
why isn't it friday home time yet?
i'm putting my head down on my desk - wake me before everyone leaves.
word of the day - jul 25 08
sempiternal
adjective
of never ending duration; having beginning but no end; everlasting; endless.
does it EVER end with you people??
adjective
of never ending duration; having beginning but no end; everlasting; endless.
does it EVER end with you people??
Thursday, July 24, 2008
word of the day - jul 24 08
kvetch
adjective
1. to complain habitually.
2. a complaint.
3. a habitual complainer.
did i mention that my office smells?
adjective
1. to complain habitually.
2. a complaint.
3. a habitual complainer.
did i mention that my office smells?
in the city of townsville...
you know that episode of the powerpuff girls where they try to make a new sister and she comes out horribly deformed and they name her 'bunny' and she jumps around yelling "bunneh, bunneh, bunneh!" and can't blink her eyes in unison? what do mean you don't know that episode? you don't know what a powerpuff girl is? you're useless... here's a visual to help you out:
anyway... the point i was getting at is i think the same kind of situation applies to liv tyler and her sister mia:
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
this is reportable?
why not just make a headline about the sky being blue or turtles being the perfect pets? everyone already knows so why bother telling them?
"Summer turning out to be wettest ever in GTA"
We're on track to beat a 28-year record if the amount of rain surpasses 271.5 milimetres by July 31.
"Summer turning out to be wettest ever in GTA"
We're on track to beat a 28-year record if the amount of rain surpasses 271.5 milimetres by July 31.
word of the day - jul 23 08
vituperation
noun
1. the act or an instance of speaking abusively to or about.
2. sustained and severelt abusive language.
according to his mom and sister, christian bale has quite the gift for vituperation.
noun
1. the act or an instance of speaking abusively to or about.
2. sustained and severelt abusive language.
according to his mom and sister, christian bale has quite the gift for vituperation.
thoughts...
you know, when it was raining AGAIN last night, i thought to myself, "gee i hope the office smells worse this morning..."
well, the office as a whole smells less bad but as soon as you round the corner into my section you get hit in the face with an offensive wall of stink... more like bitch slapped by stank. here we go for another day of shallow breaths and periodically shoving my air freshener up my nose.
(bear with me on this one... i'll probably be complaining about this daily until the smell goes away or we finally move to the new office.)
well, the office as a whole smells less bad but as soon as you round the corner into my section you get hit in the face with an offensive wall of stink... more like bitch slapped by stank. here we go for another day of shallow breaths and periodically shoving my air freshener up my nose.
(bear with me on this one... i'll probably be complaining about this daily until the smell goes away or we finally move to the new office.)
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
thoughts...
i think that if i accidentally breathe in too deeply i may throw up...
seriously, the stench around here is noxious.
seriously, the stench around here is noxious.
that's a load of carp!
no typo there...
i said a load of carp!
this spa in virginia has started offering fish pedicures!
you put your tootsies in the little pedicure bath with up to 100 tiny carp and they swarm your feet, eating off the dead & flaky skin... creepy, no? can you feel the little fishies nibbling at your toes now? is it freaking you out??
"Fish pedicures: Carp rid human feet of scaly skin"
Ready for the latest in spa pampering? Prepare to dunk your tootsies in a tank of water and let tiny carp nibble away.
thanks davina
i said a load of carp!
this spa in virginia has started offering fish pedicures!
you put your tootsies in the little pedicure bath with up to 100 tiny carp and they swarm your feet, eating off the dead & flaky skin... creepy, no? can you feel the little fishies nibbling at your toes now? is it freaking you out??
"Fish pedicures: Carp rid human feet of scaly skin"
Ready for the latest in spa pampering? Prepare to dunk your tootsies in a tank of water and let tiny carp nibble away.
thanks davina
word of the day - jul 22 08
malinger
intransitive verb
to feign or exaggerate illness or inability in order to avoid duty or work.
intransitive verb
to feign or exaggerate illness or inability in order to avoid duty or work.
holy putrid hell, batman!
turns out i didn't follow through with my threat to call in sick today...
but i damn well should have. maybe i'll actually be sick by tomorrow.
the smell from yesterday seems to have only intensified since then... well actually, i'm not sure if it's worse or if i'm just experiencing it anew this morning. it's bloody awful. and cold! all day yesterday and all night the a/c has been going full blast while all the doors in the place were open. yeah, we love the environment. i turned up the temperature this morning and put the system on auto but it'll still take some time to warm up in here.
my worry... well, not my only worry but a worry i have is the fans... they were setup with the intention of helping to dry stuff out but all they seem to be doing is creating cold air and pushing the stank about the office. so just as your nose gets used to the smell, a fresh new gust of mould-y goodness smacks you in the face!
but i damn well should have. maybe i'll actually be sick by tomorrow.
the smell from yesterday seems to have only intensified since then... well actually, i'm not sure if it's worse or if i'm just experiencing it anew this morning. it's bloody awful. and cold! all day yesterday and all night the a/c has been going full blast while all the doors in the place were open. yeah, we love the environment. i turned up the temperature this morning and put the system on auto but it'll still take some time to warm up in here.
my worry... well, not my only worry but a worry i have is the fans... they were setup with the intention of helping to dry stuff out but all they seem to be doing is creating cold air and pushing the stank about the office. so just as your nose gets used to the smell, a fresh new gust of mould-y goodness smacks you in the face!
Monday, July 21, 2008
word of the day - jul 21 08
dank
adjective
unpleasantly moist of humid; damp and, ofter, chilly: a dank cellar.
adjective
unpleasantly moist of humid; damp and, ofter, chilly: a dank cellar.
the wet set
in case you may or may not have noticed, it rained in and around the toronto area over the weekend. i didn't notice too much as i was enjoying the sunny weather north of the city.
anyhoo... my office sure noticed the precipitation.
walked in this morning to the most fantastic odour ever and soggy carpets. pretty much the entire main floor is wet...
you see, my office has this little problem with storm water backing up into this one room in the building. during the last storm, you could actually hear sound of the water rushing through the walls of that room and the carpet was bulging like it was breathing as water came in! in one of the most negligent cases of health & safety i have personally ever witnessed, to deal with the mould associated with the water problem, we normally just keep the door to that room closed. doors make the best fine particulate filters.
i heard it through the grapevine that this is the third (count 'em 1 - 2 - 3!) time we've had a major incident and this is the first time they've called the building manager... owing to my vast experience with water, if it were me, i'd be on the phone to the building manager and the insurance people so fast it's make you dizzy. but apparently no one around here gives a shit about water or mould...
but seriously! this is a major concern! i bet there is mould under all if not most of the carpet on the main floor. hello unsafe working conditions! people could get sick! no, not concerned with that? what's that? also not concerned with trying to rent this space to someone else after we move offices? water coming through the floor, mould infiltration? sounds like a wicked awesome bargain - i'll take it!
so everything here is damp and there's a fan going to help dry things out (band-aid on a major artery bleed) making things cold. cold and damp, everyone in summer clothes - super fantastic.
i'm calling in sick tomorrow.
anyhoo... my office sure noticed the precipitation.
walked in this morning to the most fantastic odour ever and soggy carpets. pretty much the entire main floor is wet...
you see, my office has this little problem with storm water backing up into this one room in the building. during the last storm, you could actually hear sound of the water rushing through the walls of that room and the carpet was bulging like it was breathing as water came in! in one of the most negligent cases of health & safety i have personally ever witnessed, to deal with the mould associated with the water problem, we normally just keep the door to that room closed. doors make the best fine particulate filters.
i heard it through the grapevine that this is the third (count 'em 1 - 2 - 3!) time we've had a major incident and this is the first time they've called the building manager... owing to my vast experience with water, if it were me, i'd be on the phone to the building manager and the insurance people so fast it's make you dizzy. but apparently no one around here gives a shit about water or mould...
but seriously! this is a major concern! i bet there is mould under all if not most of the carpet on the main floor. hello unsafe working conditions! people could get sick! no, not concerned with that? what's that? also not concerned with trying to rent this space to someone else after we move offices? water coming through the floor, mould infiltration? sounds like a wicked awesome bargain - i'll take it!
so everything here is damp and there's a fan going to help dry things out (band-aid on a major artery bleed) making things cold. cold and damp, everyone in summer clothes - super fantastic.
i'm calling in sick tomorrow.
Friday, July 18, 2008
a lesson about cheese
elite conversationalist 1: saganaki. is that the cheese we set on fire?
ec2: saganaki was the dish, kefalograviera was the cheese.
ec3: is that a real word or did you just randomly type letters?
ec2: i'm hurt by your lack of faith. :( it's totally a real word. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/kefalograviera
ec1: but it wouldn't be unlike [so-and-so] to come up with a word like that and then totally try to convince us it was real...
ec2: i WAS always very good at balderdash...
ec1: you're balderdash!
ec3: i feel like we may have lost focus...
ec1: what were we talking about again?
ec2: we don't lose focus, we just go off on tangents sometimes. to wander back to saganaki, you can also make it with kasseri, or kefalotyri cheese.
ec2: saganaki was the dish, kefalograviera was the cheese.
ec3: is that a real word or did you just randomly type letters?
ec2: i'm hurt by your lack of faith. :( it's totally a real word. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/kefalograviera
ec1: but it wouldn't be unlike [so-and-so] to come up with a word like that and then totally try to convince us it was real...
ec2: i WAS always very good at balderdash...
ec1: you're balderdash!
ec3: i feel like we may have lost focus...
ec1: what were we talking about again?
ec2: we don't lose focus, we just go off on tangents sometimes. to wander back to saganaki, you can also make it with kasseri, or kefalotyri cheese.
conflicting reports...
whilst reading the daily news this morning, i was disheartened to hear that gas is going back up... i got all excited and filled up both cars last night at 128 cents/litre and this morning i awake to 126! i guess i could squeeze like 5 more litres into each car before it skyrockets tomorrow.
anyhoo... on to the real point of this post.
when i opened up thestar.com this morning, i was greeted with the following:
anyhoo... on to the real point of this post.
when i opened up thestar.com this morning, i was greeted with the following:
the big story about the crime rate in toronto being down surrounded by stories about crime! how ironic! i think they don't know what they're talking about...
also, who else is terribly disappointed in barenaked lady stephen page??word of the day - jul 18 08
tatterdemalion
noun
1. a person dressed in tattered or ragged clothing; a ragamuffin.
2. tattered; ragged.
what? WHAT!?
yeah, i like to make up words too...
noun
1. a person dressed in tattered or ragged clothing; a ragamuffin.
2. tattered; ragged.
what? WHAT!?
yeah, i like to make up words too...
Thursday, July 17, 2008
shameless self-promotion
so awhile ago, i told you i was getting my etsy.com site off the ground...
it's now officially a store! i've got lots of goodies up there now and i'm adding more as fast as i can! hopefully the enthusiasm of buyers will reach my level of enthusiasm about listing things there.
here's the address once again in case you forgot from before:
go and have a peek!
also, tell all your friends!
here are some samples of some recently listed items:
word of the day - jul 17 08
anodyne
adjective
1. serving to relieve pain; soothing.
2. not likelyto offend; bland; innocuous.
3. a medicine that relieves pain.
4. anything that calms, comforts, or soothes disturbed feelings.
the project i am working on is so frustrating that slamming my head into the wall several times served to be quite anodyne.
adjective
1. serving to relieve pain; soothing.
2. not likelyto offend; bland; innocuous.
3. a medicine that relieves pain.
4. anything that calms, comforts, or soothes disturbed feelings.
the project i am working on is so frustrating that slamming my head into the wall several times served to be quite anodyne.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
black hole pipe dreams
"Stephen Hawking 'mulling' Waterloo move"
Could the world's most famous physicist be headed for Waterloo?
A report out of Britain suggests Stephen Hawking is considering an invitation to come work at the Perimeter Institute for Theoretical Physics.
is it wrong that all i can think about it that the word 'perimeter' has the word 'rim' in it and my awful, nasty mind is chuckling in the gutter?
Could the world's most famous physicist be headed for Waterloo?
A report out of Britain suggests Stephen Hawking is considering an invitation to come work at the Perimeter Institute for Theoretical Physics.
is it wrong that all i can think about it that the word 'perimeter' has the word 'rim' in it and my awful, nasty mind is chuckling in the gutter?
what WHAT?!?
there was nothing, nothing, in the million dollar song about buying cocaine...
"Cocaine bust nabs Barenaked Ladies' Page"
Lead singer arrested in village near Syracuse by police investigating an oddly parked car
tis a shame... the whole bunch seemed like very wholesome people...
but i've been perusing this people magazine special from awhile back about celebrities who were 'gone too soon' and looks can be deceiving... drug problems galore for even the squeaky clean.
"Cocaine bust nabs Barenaked Ladies' Page"
Lead singer arrested in village near Syracuse by police investigating an oddly parked car
tis a shame... the whole bunch seemed like very wholesome people...
but i've been perusing this people magazine special from awhile back about celebrities who were 'gone too soon' and looks can be deceiving... drug problems galore for even the squeaky clean.
word of the day - jul 16 08
antediluvian
adjective
1. of or relating to the period before the biblical flood.
2. antiquated; from or belonging to a much earlier time.
3. one who lived before the biblical flood.
4. a very old (or old-fashioned) person.
adjective
1. of or relating to the period before the biblical flood.
2. antiquated; from or belonging to a much earlier time.
3. one who lived before the biblical flood.
4. a very old (or old-fashioned) person.
enough already!
now this is really getting on my nerves!
who does this 'work' person think he is anyway? always disrupting my goofing off??
this is the last straw here! i actually worked and nothing else since i got in this morning! up until this lovely break, it was work, work, work! who does that? who can survive like that!? i'm getting a headache just thinking about it.
hopefully this work spurt will be enough so that i can coast on to friday with minimal additional effort...
who does this 'work' person think he is anyway? always disrupting my goofing off??
this is the last straw here! i actually worked and nothing else since i got in this morning! up until this lovely break, it was work, work, work! who does that? who can survive like that!? i'm getting a headache just thinking about it.
hopefully this work spurt will be enough so that i can coast on to friday with minimal additional effort...
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
highway fuckery
so a drive that only took me precisely 2 hours and 5 minutes on the way there on sunday afternoon ended up taking me more than 3.5 hours on the way back late monday night...
the colossal fuck-up that is the highway situation in southern ontario was at it's worst last night with every highway paving crew in a 6 hour radius on the road! in either direction, the 401 was a creepy, crawly mess. 3 lanes condensed in 1 and then pushed onto the shoulder.
there was this stretch coming into cambridge and waterloo region that was absolutely fucking terrifying... there's really no other way to describe it. with minimal warning, all 3 lanes are forced into 1 lane in the left shoulder... no lights, only traffic cones are directing you and you're suddenly rolling along the rumble strips. it was very claustrophobic... i felt like somehow i'd been directed to the wrong side of the cones and at any minute they'd start closing me off into the centre median. and it's not like the cones were just marking the lane you we're supposed to be in - they were all over the freaking highway, twisting and turning your route all over the place.
so after getting clear of that, it should be easy sailing the rest of the way, right?
alas, that is not the way things work...
just east of the highway 6 exit, big, bright brakes lights lighting up my entire windshield! the highway has come to a halt... a halt that continued all the way through milton right to halton hills! an hour. an hour i was on my brakes, inching along bit by bit... with all the hundreds of other late evening commuters. hello warning? that would have been nice... the radio would have been no help either - they were offering reports like, "a little congestion coming through milton due to some construction." yeah, that sums it up perfectly. i actually resorted to watching movies on my ipod! not irresponsibly - it was seated in it's little ipod dock with the audio playing over the car speakers. extreme raging frustration partially subdued.
surely easy sailing would be in the cards now?
as if! coming into mississaugua, more brake lights! more paving! gleefully, that wasn't nearly as much of a back-up as the milton mess. only minimal eye twitching. but i swear, if i had come over another hill or around another corner only to be met with more brake lights, i may have just punched the gas to the floor and tried to ram my way through like a bowling ball through some very stubborn pins.
don't get me wrong, i'm glad they are finally paving that shit storm... but did they have to wait until the exact moment that i didn't want them to??
the colossal fuck-up that is the highway situation in southern ontario was at it's worst last night with every highway paving crew in a 6 hour radius on the road! in either direction, the 401 was a creepy, crawly mess. 3 lanes condensed in 1 and then pushed onto the shoulder.
there was this stretch coming into cambridge and waterloo region that was absolutely fucking terrifying... there's really no other way to describe it. with minimal warning, all 3 lanes are forced into 1 lane in the left shoulder... no lights, only traffic cones are directing you and you're suddenly rolling along the rumble strips. it was very claustrophobic... i felt like somehow i'd been directed to the wrong side of the cones and at any minute they'd start closing me off into the centre median. and it's not like the cones were just marking the lane you we're supposed to be in - they were all over the freaking highway, twisting and turning your route all over the place.
so after getting clear of that, it should be easy sailing the rest of the way, right?
alas, that is not the way things work...
just east of the highway 6 exit, big, bright brakes lights lighting up my entire windshield! the highway has come to a halt... a halt that continued all the way through milton right to halton hills! an hour. an hour i was on my brakes, inching along bit by bit... with all the hundreds of other late evening commuters. hello warning? that would have been nice... the radio would have been no help either - they were offering reports like, "a little congestion coming through milton due to some construction." yeah, that sums it up perfectly. i actually resorted to watching movies on my ipod! not irresponsibly - it was seated in it's little ipod dock with the audio playing over the car speakers. extreme raging frustration partially subdued.
surely easy sailing would be in the cards now?
as if! coming into mississaugua, more brake lights! more paving! gleefully, that wasn't nearly as much of a back-up as the milton mess. only minimal eye twitching. but i swear, if i had come over another hill or around another corner only to be met with more brake lights, i may have just punched the gas to the floor and tried to ram my way through like a bowling ball through some very stubborn pins.
don't get me wrong, i'm glad they are finally paving that shit storm... but did they have to wait until the exact moment that i didn't want them to??
horrifically uninteresting news
like anyone is really surprised??
"Felicien pulls out of Beijing"
Canadian hurdling star to announce today that she has run out of time in bid to recover from injury
seriously... this girl has been nothing but disappointment since the rumbles of how great she could be started growing back before her disastrous hurdle race at the games in athens in 2004.
like owen nolan for the leafs - great assest, but only if he could stay healthy...
"Felicien pulls out of Beijing"
Canadian hurdling star to announce today that she has run out of time in bid to recover from injury
seriously... this girl has been nothing but disappointment since the rumbles of how great she could be started growing back before her disastrous hurdle race at the games in athens in 2004.
like owen nolan for the leafs - great assest, but only if he could stay healthy...
in good humour
DAMN!
i guess i also better stop concealing more than 100mLs of fluid on my person! and hiding candy-filled water guns in my carry-on... oh yeah... and taking my pocket knife out of my carry-on so the airport security people won't confiscate it...
[source]
word of the day - jul 15 08
cupidity
noun
eager or excessive desire, especially for wealth; greed; avarice.
noun
eager or excessive desire, especially for wealth; greed; avarice.
Friday, July 11, 2008
picture of the week - jul 11 08
i don't know what it is about this picture but i stopped and stared for longer than should be appropriate... then i had to gather my wits and wipe the drool off my chin. can you believe this guy turns 38 today??
in case you've been living under a rock in a cave in the himalayas for the last couple year, this eye candy is justin chambers of grey's anatomy fame.
in case you've been living under a rock in a cave in the himalayas for the last couple year, this eye candy is justin chambers of grey's anatomy fame.
word of the day - jul 11 08
propound
transitive verb
to offer for consideration; to put forward; to propose.
i'm thinking of changing the title of these posts to "the english language continues to confound me" because that's how i feel every time in post one.
propound. propose. why 2 alarmingly similar words to say the same thing? you know you just sound like a pompous ass when you use 'propound' rather than 'propose'...
transitive verb
to offer for consideration; to put forward; to propose.
i'm thinking of changing the title of these posts to "the english language continues to confound me" because that's how i feel every time in post one.
propound. propose. why 2 alarmingly similar words to say the same thing? you know you just sound like a pompous ass when you use 'propound' rather than 'propose'...
churches - the root of all evil?
well, the root of all suburban sprawl at least...
"They rapidly gobble up prime agriculture land, adding to the sprawl and causing burden on the city's infrastructure."
there you have it folks: churches are a burden on cities.
"Churches kickstart suburban sprawl, study shows"
Once the new church is built, the parishioners soon follow, and housing springs up around the building.
Neighbourhoods are best designed when services such as parks, stores, schools and places of worship evolve out of the needs of the community.
this story IS kind of interesting but i only posted it mostly because i wanted the chance to call churches the root of all evil. seemed like a very 'me' thing to do and there was no way i was passing it up!
"They rapidly gobble up prime agriculture land, adding to the sprawl and causing burden on the city's infrastructure."
there you have it folks: churches are a burden on cities.
"Churches kickstart suburban sprawl, study shows"
Once the new church is built, the parishioners soon follow, and housing springs up around the building.
Neighbourhoods are best designed when services such as parks, stores, schools and places of worship evolve out of the needs of the community.
this story IS kind of interesting but i only posted it mostly because i wanted the chance to call churches the root of all evil. seemed like a very 'me' thing to do and there was no way i was passing it up!
Thursday, July 10, 2008
word of the day - jul 10 08
asunder
adverb, adjective
1. into separate parts; in or into pieces: lightning split the old oak tree asunder.
2. apart or widely separated: as wide asunder as the polar regions.
adverb, adjective
1. into separate parts; in or into pieces: lightning split the old oak tree asunder.
2. apart or widely separated: as wide asunder as the polar regions.
i can't make this sh*t up...
did you know...
in 2004, a lab at a university in texan recieved a $6 million federal grant to breed radioactive armadillos for possible use in warfare.
speaking of war, and waging war...
the US military spends more money on condoms than bullets for US troops stationed in south korea. interesting...
in 2004, a lab at a university in texan recieved a $6 million federal grant to breed radioactive armadillos for possible use in warfare.
speaking of war, and waging war...
the US military spends more money on condoms than bullets for US troops stationed in south korea. interesting...
eco-warrior of the month
captain planet, he's our herogonna take pollution down to zero
he's our powers magnified
and he's fighting on the planet's side
captain planet, he's our hero
gonna take pollution down to zero
gonna help him put asunder
bad guys who like to loot and plunder
we're the planeteers
you can be one too
cause saving our planet is the thing to do
looting and polluting is not the way
hear what captain planet has to say:
the power is yours!
i absolutely love this lame shit!
first of all, there is no teenager out there THAT environmentally aware/active.
second, aren't cargo vests the best things ever??
third, what kind of environmental super power is 'heart' anyway? that ma-ti kid was definitely the sore thumb of the bunch.
fourth, who knew the captain planet song was so... literate? 'help him put asunder bad guys who like to loot and plunder'? asunder? i neveractually thought about the lyrics before...
lastly, doesn't the captain remind you of macgyver? there's no doubt in my mind that the creators of the show took a body cast of richard dean anderson and modelled the good captain after that! paying special attention to the nuances of that very special hairdo.
but enough about captain macgyver and his special friends... on to the real point of this post!
the other day i was driving home in the rain and i saw a guy watering his lawn.
A+ there buddy.
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
i love rednecks
$1 beers, big-breasted women, cage fighting... all of the most alluring things in the world in one place at one time? what redneck could resist??
but let's think about that for a second...
beers? sure, the beers are good.
women you have NO chance of getting with? fine... at least you get something to look at.
grown men in close physical contact? sounds pretty gay if you ask me... and it seems it turned out to be a little gay for some drunken rednecks as well when the combatants stripped down and started kissing each other!
supposedly it was a stunt for sacha baron cohen's upcoming movie... it's pretty f*cking awesome. wish i could have been there to see all the red and enraged faces!
"This wrestling style causes fights"
but let's think about that for a second...
beers? sure, the beers are good.
women you have NO chance of getting with? fine... at least you get something to look at.
grown men in close physical contact? sounds pretty gay if you ask me... and it seems it turned out to be a little gay for some drunken rednecks as well when the combatants stripped down and started kissing each other!
supposedly it was a stunt for sacha baron cohen's upcoming movie... it's pretty f*cking awesome. wish i could have been there to see all the red and enraged faces!
"This wrestling style causes fights"
electrifying!
a government laboratory in Beijing uses electric eels to predict the time and location of earthquakes. in 2005, its accuracy rate was 89 percent.
[source]
[source]
word of the day - jul 9 08
greedy
adjective
1. excessively or inordinately desirous of wealth, profit, etc.; avaricious: the greedy owners of the company.
2. having a stong or great desire for food or drink.
3. keenly desirousl eager (often fol. by of or for): greedy for praise.
adjective
1. excessively or inordinately desirous of wealth, profit, etc.; avaricious: the greedy owners of the company.
2. having a stong or great desire for food or drink.
3. keenly desirousl eager (often fol. by of or for): greedy for praise.
OMG! WTF?
lamest. post title. ever.
but i'm going to go ahead and stick with it.
"Message from Bell, Telus: Pay"
Cellphone giants want to ding you 15 cents for every text you recieve
this is officially retarded.
charging customers for something they have no control over.
why not just add yet another flat service fee to our bills? for instance, i have a $25/month plan with $10/month for unlimited messaging and yet some how my bill averages about $50+ each month... i'll admit to some long distance charges but still...
i guess the money grubbing whores at the major companies just see every kid with a cellphone as a giant dollar sign. texting is infinitely more popular that calling and it's popularity is steadily on the rise so why not take 'em for all they're worth? seems like an excellent business strategy.
but i'm going to go ahead and stick with it.
"Message from Bell, Telus: Pay"
Cellphone giants want to ding you 15 cents for every text you recieve
this is officially retarded.
charging customers for something they have no control over.
why not just add yet another flat service fee to our bills? for instance, i have a $25/month plan with $10/month for unlimited messaging and yet some how my bill averages about $50+ each month... i'll admit to some long distance charges but still...
i guess the money grubbing whores at the major companies just see every kid with a cellphone as a giant dollar sign. texting is infinitely more popular that calling and it's popularity is steadily on the rise so why not take 'em for all they're worth? seems like an excellent business strategy.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
whoopsie doodle!
"Romanian doctor accidentally severed man's penis"
yeah... that's all i got... just a great big OOPS!
but the guy did $795,000 in compensation... would that be enough for you to part with your junk?
and for this little slip of the scalpel, the doctor's license was only suspended for 1 year! how can you still be allowed to be a doctor?
yeah... that's all i got... just a great big OOPS!
but the guy did $795,000 in compensation... would that be enough for you to part with your junk?
and for this little slip of the scalpel, the doctor's license was only suspended for 1 year! how can you still be allowed to be a doctor?
hans moleman?
for serious?this is the neighbour you call 'eccentric'...
"'Mole Man' spent 40 years digging"
For 40 years, the retired English engineer quietly worked alone, expanding the basement at his family's Victoria era home, at 121 Mortimer Road, in the London borough of Hackney.
Experts, called in by borough council, estimated that one little old man had managed to move 100 cubic meters of earth from beneath the roads and buildings close to his property. In all, he had reached out 18 meters beyond his basement, and only stopped digging deeper when he finally hit the water table.
Neighbour Marc Beishon dryly jokes that they always expected William's head to suddenly poke out of their kitchen floor.
word of the day - jul 8 08
somniferous
adjective
causing or inducing sleep
HA! that seminar this morning was quite somniferous...
maybe it's just that i was sleepy because it was actually interesting...
i'm going to go ahead and blame a certain someone (you know who you are) for giving me the sleeping disease where you can't keep your eyes open in a situation where someone else is talking and you're supposed to be attentive.
adjective
causing or inducing sleep
HA! that seminar this morning was quite somniferous...
maybe it's just that i was sleepy because it was actually interesting...
i'm going to go ahead and blame a certain someone (you know who you are) for giving me the sleeping disease where you can't keep your eyes open in a situation where someone else is talking and you're supposed to be attentive.
some advice
you want to know why your pictures don't all fit in one e-mail? and why you had to send them each individually?
THEY ARE TOO BIG!
damn woman! take smaller pictures!
THEY ARE TOO BIG!
damn woman! take smaller pictures!
two in a row?
this is the second day is a row that work has interfered with my slacking off!
the nerve! i always knew work was rude but i never knew how rude.
well, actually, this morning wasn't really work... it was a work-related seminar... that i actually signed up for on my own free will... don't look at me like that. you know i'm a glutton for punishment. but there was free HOT breakfast! and i got a pen! totally worth it, right? then there was the not actually doing any work... that's a bonus. but then there was the traffic... and the hot, humid, sticky weather, and the fearing embarrassing yourself by falling asleep during the presentation... let's just call it even then, shall we?
the nerve! i always knew work was rude but i never knew how rude.
well, actually, this morning wasn't really work... it was a work-related seminar... that i actually signed up for on my own free will... don't look at me like that. you know i'm a glutton for punishment. but there was free HOT breakfast! and i got a pen! totally worth it, right? then there was the not actually doing any work... that's a bonus. but then there was the traffic... and the hot, humid, sticky weather, and the fearing embarrassing yourself by falling asleep during the presentation... let's just call it even then, shall we?
Monday, July 7, 2008
that pesky work thing
you know, that thing that intrups your goofing off? isn't it annoying...?
things were all thrown into a panic around here this morning due to a miscommunication with dates. there was this meeting that was supposed to be today and then it got moved to tuesday. OR SO WE THOUGHT! turns out, it was actually still today.
so at like 10:30 we have to start doing everything we were going to do all day today by 1:30! mad printing of documents ensues.
this is not the kind of high pressure situation i prefer to start my week with.
then, then i was stupid and gave myself 2 more deadlines within the next week during the meeting. fan-freaking-tastic. why do i have to aim to please? why can't i just be content with slacking? geeze...
things were all thrown into a panic around here this morning due to a miscommunication with dates. there was this meeting that was supposed to be today and then it got moved to tuesday. OR SO WE THOUGHT! turns out, it was actually still today.
so at like 10:30 we have to start doing everything we were going to do all day today by 1:30! mad printing of documents ensues.
this is not the kind of high pressure situation i prefer to start my week with.
then, then i was stupid and gave myself 2 more deadlines within the next week during the meeting. fan-freaking-tastic. why do i have to aim to please? why can't i just be content with slacking? geeze...
word of the day - jul 7 08
palaver
noun
1. idle talk.
2. talk intended to beguile or decieve.
3. a parley usually between persons of different backgrounds or cultures or levels of sophistication; a talk; hence, a public conference and deliberation.
4. to talk idly.
5. to flatter; to cajole.
this is why the english language is so frustratingly complicated - there are a million weird and wonderful words for every little thing! stupid mish-mash language!
noun
1. idle talk.
2. talk intended to beguile or decieve.
3. a parley usually between persons of different backgrounds or cultures or levels of sophistication; a talk; hence, a public conference and deliberation.
4. to talk idly.
5. to flatter; to cajole.
this is why the english language is so frustratingly complicated - there are a million weird and wonderful words for every little thing! stupid mish-mash language!
Friday, July 4, 2008
picture of the week - july 4 08
get this... these are 'Krispy Kreme Bacon Cheddar Cheeseburgers' and apparently they were served up at google's NYC office cafeteria to celebrate america's obesity. NO! they were served for the head cafeteria guy's birthday!
gross with a side of grease.
gross with a side of grease.
word of the day - jul 4 08
tutelage
noun
1. the act of guarding or protecting; guardianship; protection.
2. the state of being under a guadian or tutor.
3. instruction, especially individual instruction accompanied by close attention and guidance.
i mostly like this word because it reminds me of the word 'turtle'...
don't ask.
noun
1. the act of guarding or protecting; guardianship; protection.
2. the state of being under a guadian or tutor.
3. instruction, especially individual instruction accompanied by close attention and guidance.
i mostly like this word because it reminds me of the word 'turtle'...
don't ask.
tids and tads
so it's the big hoo-ha down south today and while they're all getting drunk and giving birth to food babies the rest of the world has ground to a halt... gotta put a stop to this or else they're going to use it as scientific proof that the universe revolves around them and them alone.
speaking of national holidays... i got a call on tuesday (that was canada day if you weren't keeping track) from someone in the company that works in the states - she wanted to talk about something only slightly business related so i was cool with it. she wanted me to respond to some e-mail she'd sent on the friday (i was on vacation already) and it was urgent. i was all, "umm... can in wait until tomorow? it's kind of a holiday around here..." and she replies, "oh yeah!" like she'd just been hit in the head with a big remembering boulder "no wonder no one in canada is returning my phone calls today!"
in other fantastic news, the price of crude went up for no apparent reason overnight and i hear it's sitting at about $145 a barrel... and the corner gas station is milking that for all it's worth and has shot up the price to 137.6 cents a litre; inching closer and closer to making the $/barrel price the same as the cents/litre price. whores, the whole lot of them!
speaking of national holidays... i got a call on tuesday (that was canada day if you weren't keeping track) from someone in the company that works in the states - she wanted to talk about something only slightly business related so i was cool with it. she wanted me to respond to some e-mail she'd sent on the friday (i was on vacation already) and it was urgent. i was all, "umm... can in wait until tomorow? it's kind of a holiday around here..." and she replies, "oh yeah!" like she'd just been hit in the head with a big remembering boulder "no wonder no one in canada is returning my phone calls today!"
in other fantastic news, the price of crude went up for no apparent reason overnight and i hear it's sitting at about $145 a barrel... and the corner gas station is milking that for all it's worth and has shot up the price to 137.6 cents a litre; inching closer and closer to making the $/barrel price the same as the cents/litre price. whores, the whole lot of them!
Thursday, July 3, 2008
festive fireworks
here are some of those canada day fireworks pictures that didn't manage to get posted yesterday because technology is retarded.
correction
yesterday i posted about canada day beer and it's severely inflated price... turns out it was actually 'Lakeport' and not 'Laker' beers that they were gouging you for. but still... ridiculous!
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
one-track mind
"Can you finish this story without being interrupted?"
Doing too many things at once may not be saving us any time, and could be harming our health
all you need to know:
in 2005, a british study revealed that "workers distracted by email and phone calls suffer a fall in IQ more than twice that found in marijuana smokers."
blaze on.
Doing too many things at once may not be saving us any time, and could be harming our health
all you need to know:
in 2005, a british study revealed that "workers distracted by email and phone calls suffer a fall in IQ more than twice that found in marijuana smokers."
blaze on.
britney's gonna be pissed
"Starbucks closing 600 U.S. stores"
in short: Starbucks in closing 19 per cent of all U.S. company-operated stores that opened in the last two years.
hopefully, these closures will not extend up into the great white north any time in the near future... my sister and her boyfriend might perish if the starbucks up in good ol' t.bay was shutted down before they got out!
in short: Starbucks in closing 19 per cent of all U.S. company-operated stores that opened in the last two years.
hopefully, these closures will not extend up into the great white north any time in the near future... my sister and her boyfriend might perish if the starbucks up in good ol' t.bay was shutted down before they got out!
you think?!?
"Grooved roads grate on drivers nerves"
it's only been like this for what? more than 3 months? and only now is the media getting wind of this? i know they (the paving people) need to wait for a weekend with good weather but it's not like we haven't seen any of those in the last little while... geezes... i think miller (the contractor, not the mayor) has an exclusive contract for highway works in southern ontario and they're getting paid LOTS of money for it! where is the service??
my biggest concern is the places where the grooved pavement is gone entirely and you can SEE the concrete road base beneath... not a good sign.
please, let's get this fixed soon. like say, before i have to drive anywhere on the 401 again?
it's only been like this for what? more than 3 months? and only now is the media getting wind of this? i know they (the paving people) need to wait for a weekend with good weather but it's not like we haven't seen any of those in the last little while... geezes... i think miller (the contractor, not the mayor) has an exclusive contract for highway works in southern ontario and they're getting paid LOTS of money for it! where is the service??
my biggest concern is the places where the grooved pavement is gone entirely and you can SEE the concrete road base beneath... not a good sign.
please, let's get this fixed soon. like say, before i have to drive anywhere on the 401 again?
inflation
speaking of horribly expensive things...
i was a canada day celebration sponsored in part by laker beer... you know:
make 'er a laker,
it's a buck a beer!
so you know the beer ain't going to actually be a buck but you'd think that since they were getting all this free advertising and public product awareness that they'd take it easy on people's pockets...
not a chance. 500% mark-up - $5 a beer.
ridiculous.
we had a wonderfully sober canada day.
i was a canada day celebration sponsored in part by laker beer... you know:
make 'er a laker,
it's a buck a beer!
so you know the beer ain't going to actually be a buck but you'd think that since they were getting all this free advertising and public product awareness that they'd take it easy on people's pockets...
not a chance. 500% mark-up - $5 a beer.
ridiculous.
we had a wonderfully sober canada day.
money matters
a little story:
we were at wonderland this weekend to ride bee-hee... bee-he-mouth? behemoth! and the people who took over from paramount have done some smart things. like strategically placing dirnk machines in the ride cues. now we all know that EVERYTHING there is ridiculously over-priced and we're just like deal with it! that's the price of going to wonderland. the new drink-of-choice to sell to the masses is this vitamin water junk... get this: they wanted you to shell out like $4.50 far about half a litre! that's $10 a litre! that's like 7.5 times the price of gas at $1.35/L! this is the same argument that comes up about bottled water... you can usually purchase a 250 mL bottle for $1 (although, there's no way you'd get that good a deal at wonderland) making it $4/L - 3 times the price of gas! if you want to make yourself feel better about the price of gas, just remember this little story and think about what a great deal you're getting!
we were at wonderland this weekend to ride bee-hee... bee-he-mouth? behemoth! and the people who took over from paramount have done some smart things. like strategically placing dirnk machines in the ride cues. now we all know that EVERYTHING there is ridiculously over-priced and we're just like deal with it! that's the price of going to wonderland. the new drink-of-choice to sell to the masses is this vitamin water junk... get this: they wanted you to shell out like $4.50 far about half a litre! that's $10 a litre! that's like 7.5 times the price of gas at $1.35/L! this is the same argument that comes up about bottled water... you can usually purchase a 250 mL bottle for $1 (although, there's no way you'd get that good a deal at wonderland) making it $4/L - 3 times the price of gas! if you want to make yourself feel better about the price of gas, just remember this little story and think about what a great deal you're getting!
word of the day - jul 2 08
mazy
adjective
resembling a maze in form or complexity; winding; intricate; confusing; perplexing.
now why would you want to go and make up an awkward word like that? would not mazelike (or maze-like) have sufficed? come on now... the spellchecker on blogger doesn't even recognize it!
adjective
resembling a maze in form or complexity; winding; intricate; confusing; perplexing.
now why would you want to go and make up an awkward word like that? would not mazelike (or maze-like) have sufficed? come on now... the spellchecker on blogger doesn't even recognize it!
rested and refreshed
well... maybe not so much rested (this weekend was definitely a busy one) but definitely refreshed. and feeling refreshed is SO much easier when i know this week is only 3 days long! i can smell the next weekend already!
so i WAS going to post fireworks pictures with this entry but my USB thingy is being weird or my computer is being weird and neither of them recognize each other... i had this happen before to another USB thingy - it worked just fine until one day, randomly, when i plugged it in, it (the removable drive) never showed up on my computer. it still works on any other computer, just not the one here at work. strange, no? anyone care to offer a guess as to why?
so i WAS going to post fireworks pictures with this entry but my USB thingy is being weird or my computer is being weird and neither of them recognize each other... i had this happen before to another USB thingy - it worked just fine until one day, randomly, when i plugged it in, it (the removable drive) never showed up on my computer. it still works on any other computer, just not the one here at work. strange, no? anyone care to offer a guess as to why?
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