so in case you live under a rock, jennifer lopez is running about town in 4-inch stilettos looking about to pop any day now... she's aiming for a february 14th delivery date... ugh... how cliche... but that day is also important so she can "make the deadlines for the weekly magazine covers"!!!
i used to like... well maybe not like... maybe respect is a better word... i used to respect j.lo because she was such a dynamo (minus the acting... maid in manhatten? really?) but now i just keeping thinking she's getting a little crazier (the carziness could also be linked to her relationship with mark anthony but let's not get into that) with everyday of her pregnancy! diva diva DIVA! bitch seems like she's the first person ever in the world to have a baby and damned if it won't be spectacular!
first there was the ridiculousness of the CUSTOM COTURE HOSPITAL GOWNS!!! IN FOUR DIFFERENT COLOURS! because you know, you gotta have costume changes throughout the show or the fans will get unrurly... the website that slings this shit has a message that says Having a baby is an extraordinary experience and moms deserve to wear something better than an ordinary hospital gown. gag! there's a freaking apendaged watermelon sliding out of you with all manner of other bodily fluids! but by all means, by a $65 "whimsical" hospital gown and dirty it up good! you can frame it and put it on the wall in the nursery!
then there was the nurseries (yes, multiple. 3 in fact!) that cost more than GDP of some small countries! $1200,000 EACH!!! and AND there's the imported furniture... from france! with 18 karat gold on the legs and knobs! and and and... wait for it... the rooms even have crystal chandeliers! WTF??? gold and chandeliers? these are babies, right? she's no giving birth to the queen of england by any chance is she? with mark "i want to suck your bolld!" anthony's DNA in the mix, she'll be lucky if her spawn are as cute as the queen of england!
ugh... my babies are going to have cardboard boxes for cribs and i'm going to wear a garbage bag for delivery.
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